Years ago I read in a book that the English do not have social skills, they have houses and gardens. While other nations work at interpersonal relationships, the English cannot be asked and pour their energies into beautifying their gardens and re-decorating their houses when they are not getting pissed and spend late nights with their heads in the nearest available toilet. I do not know what to make of this statement. Yes, sure it’s true that some love gardens and houses (and animals) more than they love people, but to one like myself, a very sociable person with a very distinct introverted streak, this lack of social interaction is a plus point, not a hinderance (ok, until you see this lack of skills in an office and then it really starts to annoy even me, but now that I do not work in an office anymore, why would I care?).
And so it was that today I started looking around my living space, with the promise that, now I have all this time to myself, I will put my solitary penchant to work. To work in the bathroom to be precise. My bathroom is a hole. I know that many bathrooms are holes, but mine is more of a hole than many others I have ever seen. There is no space for a bidet, no space for cabinets, other than the hanging one I have already, and very near no space to fully open the door. When I went through my Blue Period a few years back, I painted the side wall a deep ocean blue. It was ok at the time, even though the optical effect was one of even greater cramped space. No more so now that I feel like absolutely everything in my life, from house to husband to friends to animals to clothes, shoes and bags should be swapped for something new. If you are one of the above (and Merv, how many times did I tell you not to use the internet in the fields? You’ll wet the keyboard!) do not be offended. This is the expected result now that my job has vaporaised into thin air. It's a life overhaul domino effect.
And so the first casualty was the blue wall in the bathroom, except when you begin with ‘just one wall, it’ll take me no time’ you end up ordering new light fittings, a new toilet seat, tile paint, an orchid pot and much, much more. I am already kicking myself for not having taken any before pic so that I could post it on here. And of course until I’m done with it, there is no point in showing you work-in-progress pics either. Suffice to say it is now getting so bright that every time I open the door I am slapped in the face by the reflected light which, as you can expect, makes me feel very clever, very happy and so very skilled. And who cares if I haven’t talked to anyone in the process!
