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You'll need:
200g button mushrooms
one red chilli
two eggs
a pinch of salt
a splash of olive oil
a splash of milk
plenty of freshly cut chives
soy sauce for the mushrooms
generous grated Parmesan
This serves only one!
Cut the chilli in thin slices and throw it in your small frying pan with the olive oil on medium heat. While that is going, brush your mushrooms well, then cut into quarters and cut the chives too. Now add the chives to the chilli, stir well, add the mushrooms, stir well and add plentiful soy sauce. It was bubble and steam up, but don't let that worry you.
As the mushrooms fry away, crack your eggs into a jug, beat them lightly, add the Parmesan, a pinch of salt and a splash of milk. Given them another quick beating and pour over the mushrooms. Lower the heat to medium-low and let it all cook for five minutes or so, until the mushrooms are nice and brown and the eggs are no longer a gooey mess.